or have you ever met a person who just wants you to go like ';oohhhhh poor thing';
there's this guy at university he's one of those guys that begs for sympathy.... the first day I saw him, his very first sentence was that : ';I'm always sad and lonely...'; and 2 days latter we had a class together, he came over and
I didn't want to get into a conversation so I told him maybe after the class and he said ';ok, wait after the class . I want to tell you about my life and all the problems I've been through, then you can judge me'; (do you see what kind of guy I'm talking about??? jeeez) I had a bunch of friends escorting me out of the class to make sure he wouldn't walk up to me.
he kept trying to get around though and then a few days ago (5 months later) he came to me and gave me a portrait he'd sketched and framed himself, I tried everything and anything not to accept it but his friend had died in a car accident just the other day and his eyes were filling with tears and at the time I was too tired to handle all the water work so I took it and almost ran off to go home as fast as I could....
I don't want to be rude to him I just CAN'T STAND HIM, and it gets worse!!!!
someone gave him my number and he called me at 11 pm!!!!!!!!!!
I don't know how to get rid of him!!!! everywhere I go I see him and I just turn around and change my way or find a guy near by and start talking to him...and if he's still not leaving I start flirting...
this is sooo pathetic!!!!!! please please please tell me what to do!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'll take any adviceHow do I get rid of this guy?
show him your bad qualities show be nasty around him
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answer mine plzHow do I get rid of this guy?
You need to learn how to say NO
It's simple - he comes up to talk - you say no and turn and walk away
As far as him calling - have someone else answer the phone and tell him it is their phone
I think you just face em tell em that you don't no longer to see him n stay away from me and that if he wants to get to know you or make friends there are polite proper ways to do so and what is he doing is total wrong .
The only way to solve a problem is to face and fight don't think think of consequences n make a drama it will just make u feel worse
if you tell them these words i suppose he should have some self-respect n leave u alone and that u made 2 things gave em an advice n solved ur issue.
First you need to accept the idea that you are not responsible for this guy's happiness. You aren't at fault if he's sad. You should NOT feel guilty or sorry for him. He's the type of person who tries to use other people's pity to manipulate them. He knows some people feel bad if they ';diss'; someone, so he tried to rub that in as much as he can to get attention.
I know it sounds mean, but it doesn't MATTER that his friend died in a car accident (if that's even true.). That has nothing to do with you or with the conversation, and the fact that he's using that to his advantage is sick.
What you need to feel is anger, because that will allow you to speak the truth he needs to hear. Be firm but gentle, and absolutely do not apologize, because that gives him an angle to make you feel bad.
Hand him back the portrait, and say, ';I feel like there was a misunderstanding, and you got the wrong impression from it. I don't want to hear about your troubles. It's not fair for you to burden me with that. I have enough drama in my own life, and I can't afford to be overloaded with your problems as well. I hope you manage to be happy and I wish you good luck in the future, but I'm not interested in talking to you again.';
If he persists, tell him, ';Please understand that if you don't leave me alone right now, and if you hassle me with unwanted advances in the future, I'm going to report you to campus security.';
If you feel threatened in any way, you should go DIRECTLY to campus security and file a report. Even if it's just the fact that he won't leave you alone. It needs to be on record if he gets creepy later. Make sure you have friends nearby for moral support when you talk to him.
I'll bet you anything that his response will be something to try to manipulate you into doing what he wants. He'll tell you he's ';shocked,'; or that you've hurt his feelings. Be aware of that, and look for it. If he's trying to make you feel guilty, get angry about it. Turn it back on him, and say, ';Stop trying to use guilt to manipulate me. I'm not responsible for your happiness. YOU are, and your pity party is a total turn off.';
Good luck--what an annoying thing to have to deal with!
Jasmin,
I realize it's difficult to do when someone is pathetic but you have to be blunt. It doesn't have to be mean, but you can't wiffle waffle or be weak about it.
Let's say his name is Jeff. ';Jeff,'; you'll say, ';I really don't feel about you the way you want me to and I never will. I need you to leave me alone, Jeff.';
That sounds a little harsh, but firm honesty is a lot kinder in the long run.
If that doesn't do it, you have to get even firmer: ';Jeff, I don't want to talk to you. Leave me alone.';
Then if that doesn't work. ';Jeff, this is harassment and I WILL report you.';
Finally, ';Jeff, I'm calling the police.';
And keep your friends around you. Also, alert people as to what's going on. You want to have a support network in place to protect you. It sounds stupid, but things have gotten crazy before so best be prepared. Also, start carrying a little thing of mace on your keychain.
Best of luck! I've had a stalker and it was a very difficult ending.
I have to say, you just gotta be assertive, and of course, Be honest.
If I would you, I would sit down with him, just two of us and have a very frank, open, honest and to the point conversation as to, of course you sympathise with his problem, you wouldn't want to be part of it.
Just because you have got your own life to deal with and its not ideal for you to get involved in other misgivings.
The conversation should stop with, “this is the end of conversation and I would request you to respect my privacy and would like not to be bothered again anywhere. Please!! And then Say, best of luck” and start walking away.
If think, if that guy has got any self esteem, he wouldn’t bother you again.
Best of luck !!
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